SILICON VALLEY–The Simming Prize Board of Trustees yesterday accepted Charles Starr’s bid to buy the prize and go private, a deal that would give the simming world’s richest person control over the community’s oldest award. The deal has polarized the simming community, despite no one caring one bit about the prize eleven months ago.
RISA–James East took control of Independence Fleet last month after the club’s leader, BJ Wheeler, left his keys in the ignition of the group’s flagship while vacationing on Risa. East found the unattended ship in orbit and immediately flew it back to fleet headquarters, where he assumed fleet command just as Wheeler finished his morning piña colada.
BRAVO FLEET HQ–Bravo Fleet Executive Council member Admiral Zachary O’Connell and Bravo Fleet Task Force 99 & USS Triumphant commander Rear Admiral Michael Aravan ended a heated six-hour expletive-filled argument Monday night without splitting the fleet.